Saddest Day

Today is 2nd of January 2010. It is a day i need to rush back Penang again. I can't sleep well at the night before. Lying on the bed. I can't control myself keep thinking of 'her' and the happy moments and sad moments that we have went through together.'Her' is the one that always will appear on my mind."Her" is the only one I want to care about her... worry about.. And want to get know how is "her" now.. Nothing can change my mind.. A few moment flash back lots of things. I have let 'her' cry again. I'm feel sorry to 'her'. I lost 'her' phone. I really don't know what i'm thinking on my mind. Always lets the unhappy cases happened. Everything is out of my control.. Everything is coming so quick.. Where is "She" now? Missing of "Her" again.. I'm have broke my promise. Always disappointed to her. We will started quarrel again when talk about this matters.. "She" don't want me to make any promise to "her" anymore. It's hard time for me now. So, the way to show "her " how much i love "her" , just action and prove it to "her". No more excuse.. No more any rubbish reason.. This is the last last chance for me. I have no rights to have any request from "her". Now, i just can try all my best to do well everything. I really hope "she" can stay beside me support me, accompany me pass through the hard time. At the same time, i also will stay beside her all the single day.. Don't leave me alone.. Don't stay far away from me.. It's very scary.. Now is 5 am in the morning. I'm still awake.. I just hang off my call with "her". "Her " bedtime now. Don't disturb her.. Let's continue my blog, I knew i have done many mistake to "her". I knew what i had done to "her". I'm feel so upset but i really have learn from my wrong.. I need to change. I'm not going to waste my times. There is not much time left. Everyone says that 'Love is just a part of our life, love not everything'. Yea.. I agree with them but i also have my own opinion.. I just want depressed my feeling from deep heart and what i'm thinking on my mind.. I can lost everything but i cannot lost "her". "She" is important to me, and "she" is my motivation.. I do i love "her". I will show to her how much i love her. I will love her by trying hard in my study and working.. I don't want miss up anything.. I love to spend my times with her.. I don't want lets her disappoint again. i won't break the promise. Feel tired and sleepy now.. Good night.. Muacks.. Muacks..